Oh that I knew...

I am in a funny place, no I am in an uncomfortable place. Are the circumstances in my life not changing because I lack faith or is it for reasons I can't see or understand. I am weary of well doing, declaring and standing on the promises .... all those things we as believers are taught to believe & do. I have been standing for more than a minute or two and yet things seem to be getting worse and not better... my finances are in a mess, that happens when more is going out than coming in. My home is under attack on several fronts it feels like on some days and to be honest I feel like just running away. But my spirit cries out that I am to wait.... the night will not last forever. I know my God can and will deliver me from all that oppresses me and my house at the moment. But in the mean time where do I voice my discontent and concern... am I speaking without faith if I say I am tired of this turmoil and pain? A dear and wonderful friend says we must speak from Victory... I agree! But what do we do with the pain and the doubt that all of us feel at times... we are all human and we have human emotions.... is God displeased with us if we are just honest about where we are and it isn't from victory we are speaking from or is HE displeased with the dishonesty of us saying / declaring all the "right" things with our mouth but our heart is saying other things when no one is listening... do we do others in the body of Christ a disservice when we aren't honest that even us "warriors' of faith have moments of discouragement and weariness... where is the line between faith and failure and who decides? I know that I know this season in my life is temporary, everything not of God is temporary... but the feelings and emotions are real in this moment! My Prayer today Father I give it all to You... I would ask for a quick and speedy answer, but never the less I will still be here tomorrow and the next day crying out from this dark place for even in my doubt and lack I know that nothing compares to YOU! In Jesus Name Amen

"Oh that I knew where I might find Him, That I might come to His seat!" Job 23:3